The Horror of Hakeem Jeffries' Ultra-Cringey Instagram

Doesn't this guy have better things to do?

When is the last time you went out of your way to follow a politician on social media—not because you felt compelled to keep up to speed with a particularly interesting or impactful election, but because you’re genuinely interested in them as a person and enjoy peeking through carefully curated digital windows to get a glimpse of their ostensibly “normal” life?

I ask not because I want to actually know who you follow online—believe me, I don’t care. No one cares—but in light of this fairly typical exchange between Jack and me this morning:

How the sausage gets made.

Scintillating stuff, I know.

Nevertheless, how could I pass on an opportunity to smooth out those last stubborn ridges of grey matter that keep getting in the way of living an untroubled, unbothered life? So, with little more than a passing thought for the irrevocable psychic harm to which I’d be exposing myself, I agreed to look at the Instagram account of House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries. And, as you will soon discover, that was a huge mistake.