
There’s a coffee shop near my house that used to sell a bumper sticker with a cat holding a gun that said “ARM THE ANIMALS.” I think about this image a lot because I think we should, in fact, arm the animals. They deserve to go full Planet of the Apes on our asses, wipe us out, and reclaim the planet.
I’ve never felt this more strongly than I do now, as we continue to abuse the environment with little regard for our dwindling resources or the people who will suffer most immediately for these abuses. That’s dire enough as it is, but with America’s slide into a fascist state, we can guarantee such abuses will continue for years to come. The billionaires who are most at fault for decimating our natural resources are closer than ever to the highest power in the land, and any regulation that existed before has been tossed aside. Plus…all the other living nightmares that are already underway and will undoubtedly escalate in the weeks, months, and years to come. Cool cool cool, so what the heck are we supposed to do about it? In lieu of better options, one might ask, is this a problem for the birds? Not in the idiomatic sense, but in the literal sense? Maybe!
In last week’s Bird of the Week, Jack formally asked the question: which bird is best equipped to fight fascism? We’ve pondered the Joe Biden of Birds and the Donald Trump of Birds, so now that we’ve properly categorized our enemies, it only makes sense to do it for their opposing forces, our heroes. In the past, we’ve considered the most socialist birds, which is a similar, though not identical exercise. A cozy Venn diagram but not a circle.
While I didn’t invent the question, I feel like I’m at liberty to say this is one we’ll be mulling for some time. What follows is not an exhaustive list, but a starting place, fueled by your incredible comments on last week’s post. Y’all had some amazing insights here. Many of your picks shared specific characteristics: progressive gender dynamics, a propensity to fight, skills in stealth and violence, and a sense of community. What an inspiring list of attributes. As usual, we could all stand to be a little more like the birds, which is something I plan to keep in mind as we fight the fascist regime currently running our country.
Okay, in no particular order, here are your picks! We’re gonna kick this off with an all time banger.
Crow
Many voted for the crow and this is absolutely correct if only because a crow always looks like it’s going to fuck you up, and fascists simply don’t have that going for them. Think about it: Trump, Musk, Hitler? Silly, unserious men who look like they only thing they can fuck up is a plate of spaghetti.
Luckily, crows don’t just have their visage going for them. As J_ put it, crows “can formulate plans, communicate over long distances and amongst different murders, and hold grudges and vengeances. Plus they’re smart af!” True!
We also heard from journalist Chris Mathias via email, and I must share some of his stunning message:
Over the course of reporting my book To Catch A Fascist (out from Atria Books next year lol) I flew out to Seattle to spend some with an anti-fascist activist who went undercover in a neo-Nazi group and seriously fucked up their shit, ultimately gathering intelligence that unmasked/exposed dozens of pseudonymous white supremacists. While in Seattle spending time with him I came to learn about just how ubiquitous crows were out there, and how the University of Washington at Bothell is home to a “nightly phenomenon of nature,” during which 16,000 crows fly in at dusk and land on various buildings and sports fields before roosting in the wetlands that comprise the 50 acres of campus.
The preponderance of the birds there has made the school a natural hub for researching them, with scientists studying how crows observe humans from their perches in the trees, always gathering intelligence, staring down to determine friends from foes, remembering who gave them food and who did them harm. One study showed crows could remember a particular human face for over 14 years, even passing knowledge of that face down to younger generations.
The school’s scientists have also observed the crows holding “funerals,” dozens of them flocking to their fallen friend, sometimes pecking at the carcass, inspecting it, constantly cawing at each other, then falling silent for minutes, before suddenly, and all at once, flapping their wings and flying away. The working theory is that these rituals are a way for the birds to study a corpse, to divine what dangers - disease, poison, predators, other crows - might lurk nearby, dangers that could one day, if they’re not diligent, befall them too.
This is all to say I think crows have some parallels to antifascist activists, or antifa, these past few years…crows are great at gathering intelligence and identifying threats, understanding the need to flock together for strength, to sometimes appear as a uniformed black bloc, each bird relatively anonymous and no individual greater than the group.
Like crows, I think militant antifascists over the last decade have often been misunderstood and under appreciated for their intelligence, empathy and strength. Anti-fascist activists, most often radical leftists, accurately diagnosed the MAGA movement as a fascist one, long before the mainstream commentariat and pundit class ever did. They also adapted rules - passed down to them from previous generations of activists, like those skinhead punks in Anti-Racist Action - that have real prescience now; rules like “fascists are never to be debated, they are to be defeated”; and the understanding that fascists should be deprived of every platform to spread their message; and that the state and law enforcement can’t be trusted in the fight against fascism, as their interests often align; and the understanding that sometimes fascists deserve to be punched, to get knocked the fuck out, and that to do so is a form of community self-defense. Basically, we protect us.
For adapting this militant approach to fighting fascism, “antifa” became a boogeyman to the right, and were dismissed out of hand by centrist liberals as radical extremists, part of a tiresome "both sides" critique, an equivalency that grows more glaringly false by the day. These first few months of the second Trump presidency have underscored the degree to which these radical anti-fascists were in many ways correct, and that what's needed now is a militant, unequivocal approach to beat back this fascist moment; a new popular front maybe. Whatever it is, it needs to be big. Such coalitions have been built before and can be built again. Crows, after all, have been known to fly in flocks containing two million birds.
Crows crows crows crows! We’re pounding the table here! We’re obsessed with them!
Harris’s hawk
Matt B mounted a rousing and convincing argument for the Harris’s hawk, my favorite argument being: “They protect the courts at Wimbledon, which means that they have observed the classes and probably have formed opinions about class warfare.” Brilliant!! This also calmed my nerves about the fact that RFK Jr. keeps ravens. Disturbing on many levels, but I hope those birds are taking notes and making plans. I’ll follow you anywhere, RFK Jr.-spying birds. Just tell me what to do.
Cassowary
Kai made a case for the cassowary, writing: “if someone tries to mess with a cassowary, it is capable of literally kicking them to death” (Katherine also wrote about this in her ode from a few years ago).
I like this pick for several reasons, including the fact that to me, a cassowary looks like all four Sex & the City women combined, including wardrobe? I won’t explain that further, but we know Cynthia Nixon is ready to stomp the fascists to death so I think it makes some amount of sense.
Grackle
Hell yes, a great pick, imo! Reader Gretchen Sullivan wrote, “Fierce and appropriately intimidating-looking (up for the job, visually, of scaring fascists), totally feisty, yet still collectively oriented and almost always working in groups.” If you’re not feeling galvanized yet, I really don’t know what to tell you, I’m literally considering putting a grackle on a sign when I head to my next march.
Pigeon
Look, I don’t want to pick favorites here, but I’ll just say that if the pigeon hadn’t ended up in the comments, I would have been deeply disappointed in all of you. Robot of Leisure put it perfectly: “There's tons of them so there's numbers. They're smart. Have a history of being used in subterfuge & full scale wars. They're great messengers.” Yes! We stan the pigeon here, we really truly do, but even more so after seeing the report that one attacked Fox News’ Peter Doocy recently. They are already at work waging the war! Case closed.
We also heard from folks who pitched peacocks and acorn woodpeckers (equally solid picks!) and I must give a special honorable mention to reader AOG, who nominated the Irish Republican Phoenix—the emblem of the Phoenix National and Literary Society and a bird with an amazing anti-authoritarian legacy. Anyone who read our seals ranking from a few weeks ago simply must look at this!
And finally, a dishonorable mention goes to my husband, who nominated the mockingjay, mockingly. If we’re gonna give flowers to a fake bird, it’s gotta be the Irish Republican Phoenix, though I suppose you should take inspo wherever you can get it, even if it’s in a Suzanne Collins novel. The road is long, and we’ve got to flap our anti-fascist wings together—no matter what icon we’re aping. (Though to be clear, I do believe that these birds could literally do a coup and I look forward to it.)
If you missed last week’s post, feel free to keep sharing ideas for which birds are best for fighting fascism! Hit up the comments or write us at hello@discourseblog.com.
And a reminder: you can check out our complete Bird of the Week list here, and get in touch with your bird suggestions—anti-fascist or not!—whenever you like at hello@discourseblog.com.
Not for nothing, but American bald eagles have already shown a hatred of Trump, and I want to take back our national symbol.
How about blue jays? They're noisy (good for drowning out fascists) and warn other small birds when predators are nearby. Plus, they're smarties who know how to use tools.